GoodKarma.org

Hi, I am new here, so I hope it's ok for me to post this in such a blunt way.I had posted a new subject in another room, I think it was health about my son and another family.So if you get a chance, please check it out.

What I wanted to say to Laurence about his friend is that just by you being there is a blessing.

Everything everyone has suggested is right on. But I want you to just consider also this. Is this friend of yours a super close friend or more like an aquaintance. The reason I am asking is, really only a really good an dclose friend would say this to someone.

Yes you let your frined know you are there for them, but also don't be afraid to talk to your friend directly to the heart of the issue. Because unless you are joined at the hip to this person, you can't always be there. Plus, that person is responsible to God with the gift of their own life. You can care and listen as much as you are able, and I am sure you have done that. You also wouldn't be out of line though to just say to your frieed...look I do care for and love you. You do matter to me deeply but you have got to start looking at the consequences to your own actions. If something is truely so wrong in your life, and you know there is help out there for you, but you are not willing to reach out and take a hold of that, I can't take hold of it for you.

Everyone has a legacy rather they beleive it or not, and what you hand down to others, does matter. Suicide is a permenant poison. Deppression is a poison too, and I am saying this because I have been there. More than once. And it's the wrong choice, regardless of the circumstances.

With all honestly, though it seems you might need to tip tow around this person, if you love them you will just say, look I love you, but I am not your savior. There's already a savior and I am not Him. If you need to go talk to someone, hey, I will drive you.If you don't want me to hear what's going on, then I will wait in the lobby if I can. I will even try to make the time if that's what you really need. But I don't want to be the one to have to go find your body. To clean up your mess and body and have to contact the people who love you and won't understand. trying to explain to them 'why" this happened. If you are hell bent on killing yourself, then I can't be around you. Because I will always be afraid that when I am driving over to your house...what if you decided to end it and then I would be the one to find you, and frankly it would devestate me, an dcause deep harm in my life, my relationsships....I would feel guilty like I didn't try hard enough, and it's not fair. It's not right and if you want to be active and present in this life, and realize that there are people here in your life that have been trying to reach out to you, who are choosing to stick around...because they really do care. If I didn't care I wouldn't keep talking to you about this. But you also have to give some care and respecit my feelings and know that I am being the friend in this situation. For you to start being a friend to me, or anyone else...you've got to be one to yourself. Rather you "feel" like it or not. There is life beyond the situation and how you are feeling right now. There are blessings,healing,hurt,disapointments,love,frinedships and hardships. It's life. It's not some cut and and dried thing.You can either sitck with it, and take the help that's offered to you, or not. But I can't do it for you. If you take that as I don't care, then your choosing to listen to a lie, because that's not's what is in my heart for you.

Anyways. it's just a suggestion.If you need anything, or someone to pray with Laurwence, pjcontreras6@aol.com

God bless you, and I am sorry your friend is having such a hard time.That is just my opinion.

Life can suck like you wouldn't beleive. i tried to cut my wrists at 12, Overdosed at 19 and again at 16. I am 36 now.

I had my reasons. BUT the real reason, wasn't because I didn't want to live anymore. It was because I didn't want my life to be the same way it was then, and i felt sad, scared...embarressed for feeling depressed and 'stuck' and to lazy to change it, when I knew better. You name it. Ya know what? I am so thankful to God that he saved my life.

He's blessed me in ways I couldn't have ever imagined. He gives us free will to choose. It's your friends choice,just as it's your choice to how much crap you will allow in your life from them.

If they are willing to reach out and take real help and start working on themselves to chance whatever is wrong...cool. More power to them. But if every time the phone rings they are going to bring you down, and be toxic. Love them, and let them know your there, but it may have to be from a distance for a while, and just pray for them deeply.

Take care.

Lesli

www.contrerashome.us

My special son Nathan. (one of the big blessings I would hav emissed out on if I had committed suicide.)